your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
