Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize