sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
