Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
