Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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