It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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