I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Randomize
