BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
