this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
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