what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize