I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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