you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
