At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
