Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
