My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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