I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
