We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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