just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
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