Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Randomize
