Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
