Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
