I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
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