The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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