Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
