She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
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