you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
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