can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Randomize