He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
