is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
