Kareoke will never be a sober sport
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
