Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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