If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Actions speak louder than pants.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
