pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
