mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
