Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
