UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
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