Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize