dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize
