O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
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