i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
