no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Randomize
