Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
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