With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
