im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
