Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
