i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Randomize
