The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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