I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
