yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
