If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
How does it feel to date your dad?
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
